The people monitoring me in private punished me for being upset that they hurt me psychologically.

They keep popping up now to hurt me so, like they have to and they can't hold it in, pretending I am the one being bad.

They keep doing it like it's just a punishment meaning an older lady I like will only be my friend if I don't react to it and feel upset, or else something else bad happens.

The people monitoring me in private are making it worse because they think I'm bad just to post on my problems blog.